When Pink Is No Longer Pink, And The Farmhouse Is Quiet...

It was that first mother~cry "no!" and the blood was there, and fear that the baby was not.

The weekend was long, but this morning the ultrasound confirmed what my heart already felt...Little One has been with Jesus for three weeks (unknown to us) and any day I should go through the process of labor and delivery long before we had planned.

We are sad to walk this road and end with empty arms, but I am choosing two thoughts:

* We love and accept children as a gift from God Himself, no matter how counter-cultural that may seem...

* This life is a blessing to our family, for as many weeks as the Lord saw fit to allow

"I will carry you, while your heart beats here.

Long beyond the empty cradle, through the coming years...

I will carry you, all my life.

I will praise the One who's chosen me to carry you. "

                                           ~Angie Smith

When Pink Is PINK and We Give Thanks...

It was at the college Bible study when I thought God said eight. Ok, perhaps it wasn't God, but I do remember thinking eight would be a great number of children. I had just recently become a Christian, and for the first time ever, I was surrounded by people that loved the Lord, not a man. Introductions into the world of Biblical womanhood, being a Godly wife, loving and educating  children (and lots of them), demonstrating modesty and femininity, eating healthy...these topics and many more were changing the way I was thinking.

Saved by grace, but now traveling the long journey from brokenness and rejection, I had no idea there was more carnage up ahead. Through selfishness, sin, infertility and a marriage on the edge of failure, He spoke Hope.

"I will restore to you the years the locust have eaten...And ye shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, that hath dealt wondrously with you..."            Joel 2:25,26

One miracle at a time (with the exception of the twins!) God gave us eight babies! God has blessed us over and over again in many ways, and it is true that He has restored the years the locust have eaten. We eat in plenty and are satisfied, and we are again praising the name of the Lord our God, who had dealt wondrously with us...He has blessed us with another little one.

The farm is growing again...which makes me wonder about "eight"...

Another Baby!

The best news of the week is... ANOTHER BABY!! On Saturday, my sister Emily and her husband Brandon had their first little one. His name is Brogan and he is so beautiful! I took some of the children to see him and as you can tell in the picture, it was instant love. There is something so amazing in the birth of another baby...that "something" that makes my own mother~heart do crazy things like...wonder if the Lord will bless us again. I love that babies remind me of all that is good and right, of all that is beautiful and hopeful, of purpose and fulfillment. Such a gift from our creator God!

Did you know statistically Christianity is dying, in part because as a group, we(Christians) are rejecting the very blessing of God? According to Voddie Baucham of Grace Family Baptist Church in Houston, Texas, Christianity is dying because Christians are limiting their families to two children, parents are rejecting their discipleship role in the life of their children, and the children are leaving the faith. Not having children and not passing on the faith is crippling Christianity and will eventually destroy it.


There is no doubt that a family requires sacrifices of time, money, earthly treasures and more, but there is not one single thing this world has to offer that can or will ever produce the joy and fulfillment that a houseful of children can give. And by God's grace, it is a houseful of children that will go on to love and serve our God, passing on the truth of the Bible to the next generation!


Before someone gets sidetracked with the legality of numbers, I don't mean to imply that there is a certain number that denotes "godliness". Rather, like so many other issues, it is a matter of the heart. And like so many other issues, making choices because of our selfishness should never be a part of the equation.


So here's to Brandon and Emily and baby Brogan! May this be the beginning of another army for Jesus!


*Be sure to read Joshua's comment...I completely agree!

My Future...please...

"Mommy, you look like a GaWAMMY!"

"Really Natalie?"

"(giggle giggle)You look like a GaWAMMY!"

Ha ha...urgh! No matter how blessed a hoary head is, I just don't want to be that right now...yet...not for a while. I'm just not ready. Funny thing is (not so funny to me), apparently I look the part even though I don't belong in that group.

After Natalie was born, I dropped her off at the entrance to the grocery store with my little sister, who was 24 at the time. By the time I parked and walked in, Mr. Grocery-store Greeter was cooing all over.

"So you must be grandma!"

Not exactly what a newly post-partum momma needs to hear. My eyes immediately connected with my sis, as this was the SECOND time within a few days that this mistake was made. Fighting back the tears, I headed to the produce section as fast as I could, listening, but not believing Andrea's explanation. Bless her heart, she tried to encourage me, but to no avail.

Age-wise, it could have been true. I could be Andrea's mother, and Natalie could be Andrea's daughter, making me grandma.

No thanks. Not yet. I'm loving being the momma, and I just don't want this time to pass.

Now, on the bright side, I'd love to look like Tasha Tudor when I'm a grandma. Isn't she the image of peace and grandmotherly-ness? Already my children are preparing me, (okay, requiring of me) to be soft and squishy, wear dresses and aprons, put a bun in my hair, and have cookies baking for the grandkiddos. NO NYLON SWEATPANTS, PLEASE!

In fact, Caleb just pointed to the picture of Ms Tudor and said, "That's what I want you to look like!" (How cute is that...)

I think I can do just about all they are asking...

Farmhouse Apple Dumplings and More

My friend, Cinnamon, was tempted this picture of

Farmhouse Apple Dumplings and requested the recipe. If you visit her blog, you'll find that she beat me to it, and has already made her own version. So, perhaps she'll need to make these and do a taste test, then let us all know...

Farmhouse Apple Dumplings

2 c. sugar

2 c. water

1 t. cinnamon

1/4 t. nutmeg

1/4 c. butter

Make into syrup and boil 3 minutes. Using 6 apples, peel, core and thinly slice.

2 c. flour

1 t. salt

2 t. baking powder

3/4 c shortening (or butter)

1/2 c. milk

Cut together ingredients to make dough. Roll out into 1/4" thickness. Cut into 9 squares. Arrange a handful of apple slices on each square, wrap the dough around the apples, and arrange in a baking dish. Pour syrup over the top and bake at 375 degrees for 35-40 minutes. Top with whipping cream or ice-cream if desired.

:::

So what happens around here when momma is busy and distracted with something else instead of Little Running Squash? Well, the obvious! Little Running Squash heads into the mud room bathroom and retrieves the TOILET PLUNGER! I know that has a very useful purpose, but in general, I find it disgusting. She, however, was quite proudly toting the thing around, until I saw her.

:::

Today the children were out in the barn mucking the stall for the horse and cow. I'm headed out to check soon, but they report (with as many details as possible) that Lucy the cow is showing signs of pending birth. Silly, but I feel like the resident midwife, and need to prepare for the big moment. I'm really hoping that she'll be just fine on her own and not require any intervention. As it is, I'm trying to prepare Tom for "heroic" measures, should they be necessary.

:::

It's Friday! Have a wonderful evening!

Love, Kathy

Reality On The Farm...

If you're tempted to think life is perfect here on the farm, it isn't, and we are not. Take today...

~getting up late because of multiple late nights with Little Running Squash

~arguments between the littles, which instead of being solved by brother, only grew worse

~tears over math, and a frustrated teacher who can't seem to explain it well

~hormones and cramps

~more squabbling over toys

~momma cries (literally) out to God for help

~Little Running Squash refuses to nap (again)

~more serious conversation requiring words from God, not myself

~stopped by the sheriff and issued a ticket with a rather large pricetag...

...home again and immediately greeted with Little Running Squash toddling into my arms with the most intelligent, indecipherable-to-the-untrained-ear babble saying "I LOVE YOU"

I know she said it! It was so clear...and it's all worth it.

~

It Had To Happen...

...eventually. For the most part it will be the momma's out there who understand and sympathize with the bittersweet-ness of this moment. With the twins sixteen years ago, it was pure excitement to reach the developmental milestone of walking. And imagine two babies...one on each hip! I'm quite certain there was even some relief.

With my next baby, there was the question in the back of my mind..."Will she ever walk? Is she okay?" Which quickly merged into the busyness of the next baby~now four little ones in 3 1/2 years. PLEASE walk!

When baby number five came, he was practically big enough to walk out of the hospital, and my memory is, that he always weighed more than I could lift. I was tired, and getting older...

I'm sure there was a bit of sadness with each passing milestone, as I clearly remember wondering if we would ever be blessed with another baby. The bouncy seat put away...the three month clothing too small...the exersaucer passed on to another friend...more outgrown clothes...each step "cheers!", each step a reminder of the swiftly passing time.

With our last three little girls coming in quick succession (three in 3 1/2 years), there is no question I've aged. But I've also begun to grasp the truth of "it goes by so quickly". Don't get me wrong...I'm not holding Laura back, I know this is good! But quickly flee these precious baby years...

When Momma Sleeps...

The goal this weekend was to teach little one how to sleep through the night. So far, unsuccessful. Going on just a small amount of sleep, I woke to a very productive household. A delicious breakfast of biscuits with sausage & apples was prepared, a double batch of blueberry muffins was in the oven, laundry was started, barn chores completed, inside chores were well on their way to completion, and the coffee was on! Goodness! I began to see the wisdom in sleeping in late in the morning...so much more seems to be accomplished without me present :). Truly, I owe a big thank you and lots of hugs to my children for jumping in to help a very weary momma.

"Let us not grow weary while doing good,

for in due season we shall reap

if we do not lose heart."

Galatians 6:9

Life Purpose

Our most recent miracle is already six months old, and we are feeling the swiftness of time. Yesterday I reminded the children to enjoy her...she may be the last, as I am aging quicker than I would like :) Yes, I know that aging is all part of God's sovereign, eternal plan, but there is something so amazing in the gift that God allows...that gift to co-create with our Almighty God, to carry and bring forth something so tender and precious as new life. By God's grace, her purpose will be fulfilled: Laura~crown
"...the twenty-four elders fall down before Him who sits on the throne and worship Him who lives forever and ever, and cast their crowns before the throne, saying: "You are worthy, O Lord, To receive glory and honor and power; For you created all things, And by Your will they exist and were created.' " Revelation 4:10,11

We fall down, we lay our crowns,
at the feet, of Jesus.
The greatness of, mercy and love,
at the feet of Jesus.
And we cry holy, holy, holy.
And we cry holy, holy, holy.
And we cry holy, holy, holy, is the lamb.

~Chris Tomlin