I have made a great many mistakes as a parent, and I'm sure there are more to come. One of my earlier mistakes was with guns. I know there is an entire subculture out there who, like myself, eschewed the very touching or handling of any weapon whatsoever. Wickedness, wickedness, wickedness. My son would be different, and we would start with the effective removal of anything that resembled guns.
And then a banana was a gun. One day a quite-perfectly-shaped stick was a gun. And "why?" I would ask, does he even consider constructing a gun out of his interlocking toys??? There had to be an answer and I was certain to find it. I need to confess here, that one place I knew was NOT the answer was my husband. Enter...
This is not an advertisement for the ministry, although we have been tremendously blessed by it in many ways. I simply give credit here to the place God directed me to (since I wasn't listening to or respecting my husband) which began to bring about great change in my heart. I not only began to understand boys and young men a little better, but I began to acknowledge the wisdom and understanding that God had equipped my husband with, especially in matters as they relate to raising sons. Remember my first sentence about making many mistakes...and I still continued, but change was happening, and God was at work.
Guns and boys together no longer frightened me, and I began to have a vision for "courageous boyhood". But I needed more. Recently, Josh and I read WILD AT HEART by John Eldridge. While I haven't completed the book, it didn't take me long before I was asking for forgiveness. This is a fantastic read for young men, dads, moms, and I even would like my daughters to read it when marriage is near.
The good news: Josh is hosting a giveaway for this book! Head over to his blog, read a review, Josh's opinion, and enter if you'd like. I think you'll be blessed.
10 comments:
Already did it :-) You are such a sweet Mama and you have BEAUTIFUL children!!
And yes when we do meet, my Gianna will be more than ready to mother any lost young ones you have :-) or injured....or toddlers.....or the mailman if he stays to chat :-)
hee hee
~Cinnamon
The Eldredge's have also written a book for women called Captivated. It was a very eye opening book as well into a womans heart. Great job letting your boys be boys:)) God sure did make them different than us women folk!
Yes Kathy~
I have a son that is wild at heart so I understand this so well.
Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
I loved reading this post. I remember feeling the same way about guns, and then our young sons started making guns out of legos. We realized this was part of being a boy and changed our thinking about it.
The book sounds wonderful. I'm going to be reviewing a book next week.
Blessings,
Marcia
I read that book a couple years ago and it really is quite eye opening. I also read one that his wife wrote - not so sure what I thought about that one, though. Either way, Wild At Heart is a very insightful book!
It took me so long to understand that I must let my boys be boys.
My husband was the one who guided me to understanding that they are different than us :)
I am glad that you are listening to the Lord and admitting that you made mistakes...well, I think that is the best way to learn to allow the Lord to work in you.
Many blessings to you and yours dear friend,
Maria
I think that handeling guns is something cultural. Maybe children see this on the news in your country more often than overhere in Europe? (guns are forbidden here and I never ever knew anyone who had one..)Overhere most boys play outside and do a LOT of soccor. They are agressive, scream and fight, but it is all 'in the game..'. You see, boys just need a way to let agression out of their body somehow. And not all boys are like this. Maybe your son likes a sport too?
By the way, I LOVE your blog!
Greetings from Mama Lieveheersbeestje.
I felt exactly the same way you were - I was so surprised that my son would make a gun out of anything when he hadn't been exposed to them - God has changed my thinking & I realised that He made males & females so different for a reason. We also have that book here - My hubby has read it, but maybe I should add it to my "must read" list!
God bless
Renata:)
Interested point from Mama Lieveheersbeestje; I always thought that guns were part of letting boys be boys too, but before guns, what did they play? (eg, my son is into archery)...our rule though is that one is not allowed to point the gun-shaped object or finger purporting to be a gun etc. at any person. My thought is that if that is taboo from day 1, if things ever get so that they are holding a real gun, that ingrained taboo will give them pause enough perhaps to prevent a tragedy.
About the book "Wild at Heart." My dh asked me to stop reading it as it made me so angry with the concept that caring mothers are emasculating their sons. So we are just wet nurses and nurterers for a few months (and who decides how long?) but hands off as soon as possible, all of a sudden our nurture is a bad influence? Not buying that one! It felt like such misomatry (I coined the word)...sorry to you fans. Can you tell I have a lot of boys? ;) and they are all boy, if anyone is concerned.
btw after jumping in with a first comment like that (blush) I should mention I'm a new subscriber with a similar sized family, who is thoroughly enjoying your blog!
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