The days following Christmas invigorate me. There is a fresh enthusiasm for purging, cleaning, organizing, and eliminating (treats, of course) and an overall feeling of starting anew. With a certain excitement I began decluttering today, which inevitably led to twirling. Does anyone else twirl when they clean? I found myself bouncing from one area to another, from one pile to another pile. Frustration quickly grew and the excitement escalated to irritation. My parents were born post-depression and with that came a gift of...collecting...or saving...or hoarding...or just plain PACKRAT-like behavior. I know that during the 1960's in the early years of their marriage, it probably kept them alive. In the 1970's recession, it kept us clothed and fed with a roof over our heads, and by the 1980's we had absorbed two additional households due to inheritance, and though we didn't need to continue to save for the inevitable-yet-unforseen (ever) future need, by then it was an inescapable habit.
Fast forward to my life as a homemaker, and I face a dilemna: what is responsible frugality? Though I swore against it, I confess, with shame, that I have accumulated and held on to far more than I ought to own. There is one source of my frustation. I have gadgits and widgits and chotchkies that I look at, decide I don't need or haven't touched/used in "forever", then in that split second of hesitation, I default to "Kath, the frugal homemaker...trying to be fiscally responsible and help with the finances". I begin to imagine that I could be saving money if someday I need this particular item. IF seems to be key, but it feels almost like a sickness...some disease gone crazy! Truth is, I apparently don't need much, because I save at a faster rate than I seem to use!I hate the indecision of accumulating clutter because I just can't decide what to get rid of, or if I should save for a potential need.
I need help! I'm looking for other kindred homemakers given to the ideas of frugality, repurposing, reusing, etc., who also have an understanding of simplicity and orderliness to help free me from the bondage of over-accumulation. I love the idea of making our home lovely and welcoming without filling it with clutter (besides, I'm living in a farmhouse with no storage space). So I'm looking for ideas to bring balance...beauty without bondage...simplicity without surplus.
Be brutally honest with me...I can handle it.
21 comments:
We just moved into a farmhouse ourselves after living in more modern homes for the last 15 years. I too am in the purging process and whatever doesn't seem to fit is going into the garage. Maybe after a year of it being in the garage I will be more inclined to donate it. I am my own worst clutter enemy these days. I look forward to hearing what others have for suggestions.
Blessings,
Michelle
*groan* I'm not sure how much I can help you because I am EXACTLY like that! I save EVERYTHING for a "rainy day" when I might need it - or when my family might need it. With having little ones I have found myself using more of the "in case" items I have collected, but I do tend to accumulate faster than I use things... One problem when you accumulate a lot is that you tend to forget a lot of what you have collected (or at least I do), so I need to have a good system of organisation for storage - I use plastic boxes and try to label them so I know exactly where each collected item is (or at least which type of item the box contains)... If we're ever blessed with a house with better storage spaces I'm sure I could use more of my collected things because they will be easier to access... so I dare not throw them out!! I'm not sure what kinds of things you collect, but some items might be good for your daughters' hope chests if they have them, or if your children are creative they might help you come up with uses for things you're not sure you should keep... Apart from that... I'm the worst one to give any advice... sorry!
Don't think of it as getting rid of stuff!Donate it to the Good Will or battered women shelter.These are tough times for a lot of folks and you would be helping people in need with your donations.The thing that made a big difference for me is my son has terrible allergies and asthma and clutter = dust= sickness.Still sometimes it is hard to part with my "treasure",but the idea that it will go to help someone else makes it easier!
I just wanted to say, I am right there with you my friend. I can so relate. I have no tips except throw away, give away all you can.
I like your blog...just found it today.
Christi
Oh you are so funny. I throw almost everything out for the same reason. My mother~bless her heart is a pack-rat. So clutter scares me to death!
We are on the same page. I so admire the Amish and their simple lifestyle. I had an old 120 year old Victorian house but we built a new home in the country about 2 years ago. This inspired me to keep even more simple. I must confess though I regret getting rid of all my old antique furniture. Only hang on to the classics~thats my goal!
You have fun cleaning. My schoolroom is getting the de-cluttering today!
I always heard that if you say "I might use this someday" you should get rid of it. I'm one of those fabric addicts that keeps every scrap because I might want it for a quilt or some little kid project someday. I love Melodie's idea of not thinking of it as "getting rid of" or "throwing away" because GIVING is so wonderful. I think thinking of God caring for you helps also. If you know you don't and won't need it (and you KNOW it) you can trust the Lord to provide it if for some random reason you do need it someday. And if he doesn't will it, old fashioned ingenuity will get the job done and you'll learn something. There's only positives for going for simplicity. It creates greater trust in the Lord, it makes you feel better, it creates a good atmosphere for your kids- gives you space! Things are things and they're passing. This is only the world and though we can take care of day to day life, hoarding things won't help our day to day life!
When I get rid of things- especially little sentimental things (like my old pair of favorite sandals..) I find it helpful to literally kiss them goodbye. I remember kissing my sandals and putting them in the trash- and it seemed so irreversible but ok after that. May the Lord help you and be with you on your cleaning!
Rose
Oh my! I'm right there w/you! We live in a 170+ yr old house w/NO storage except the meager, TINY closets a previous owner put in. We can from a house w/a garage AND a basement, this house has a garage but only a dirt & stone cellar...so, no storage there. I got rid a lot, but as time as passed, I need to get rid of so much more right now.
My biggest problem, shamefully, is clothes. I not only have our 21 & 18 yr old daughters' childhood clothes, but I have clothes ranging from size 6 to 16. I HAVE to donate to Good Will or give away. Simple as that.
Thanks for the reminder & the nudge. I believe I know what I'll be doing on January 2nd.
Blessings from Ohio...Kim W
I am married to a packrat, and have picked up his habit over the years. Occasionally, though, I will be ruthless in my purging of clothes and things that I just know I will never use again. I make piles for give away, throw away and save for later. Once the give away/throw away things are out of the house, it feels so good. The house feels lighter and the load of cleaning is easier. Pray about it too! God cares about all the issues in our lives. ♥
Well, I am there with Melodie.
I have to tell you I am anti pack rat, and clean clutter at least once a month. If it is something you like, but do not love, consider giving it as a present to someone you know would love it. Blankets, clothes, toiletries, give it to others in need. This will bless them, and also bless you. Yopu will feel so free letting this stuff go, you will be amazed. And Everything you get rid of, will be to a good cause, someone that doesnt have a nice home with stuff in it, that could really use what you cant. These are tough times, and God calls us to be "hillarious givers". I know you can do it!
Blessings, Christina
Remember the good old days when you and I would take turns going to each other's house to help declutter a room??? You were ruthless with me! You can do this - you know it! I always like the rule if you haven't used it in a year, then get rid of it.
I too have had a problem with accumulation. I am one that enjoys a good deal and welcome hand me downs. A few years ago I began to tell myself less stuff more life... Less stuff more life... As I began to clean out the closets, drawers and even under the beds. lol I would tell myself less stuff more life. This stuff as I call it does not breath, love or serve our Lord. I have donated it all to charity. This way we can help others and not feel the guilt of wasting it. A few things we do around here are using cloth diapers,cloth wipes, growing a garden, canning and freezing. Using a clothesline. Gathering eggs from the chickens. Buy clothes from second hand stores or reuse per child. Our meat comes from Allen's hunting. We also process the meat here at home. I try to sew and bake in bulks. What we don't eat we freeze. We use hand towels as napkins. All of our dishes are wash and reuse items. Our home school books are reused as long as the curriculum is still accurate to state standards. We live in a very small home with no closets other then the tiny bedroom closets. One more reason I feel I have no business accumulating. Blessings to you and your reorganizing. I too pray to be more frugal. Living with the peace that comes from simplicity. I have to complement you on your amazing children. You have done such a wonderful job raising them. I pray my children grow as close and as sure on the faith and love for the Lord. Blessing Catherine
It is too easy for me to throw away most everything. My husband is the complete opposite. He will keep everything and it will pile up and pile up and....well I'm sure you know what piles and piles look like :-) Me on the other hand, I will throw birthday cards that my children gave me and my husband will ask "aren't you going to keep that?" as if I were throwing the child himself away.
I must note, I do keep special things. I will keep one special card and throw away all the rest. I try and keep these in a folder and pull them out every so often to look at.
As for clothes.....I use to keep years worth of clothes now I keep one bin of clothes per child. Maybe two if it's snow outfits or something special. All the rest I donate to our local thrift store. No guilt attached at all and I'm glad it's gone. I do keep special clothes, like our first born son's cutest outfits or blanket. I like keep them for future grandchildren (first one due in March 2010).
Have I ever thrown away something I regretted? Like that extra can opener I needed? Sure. But guess what I can always go buy one for pennies at the thrift store (it was probably the one I left there :-)
At one point, when we were building our own home, we had all our clothes, furniture etc..in storage. We lived without this stuff for years as we built our home. Guess what we didn't even miss 99% of it. It was then that I learned we didn't need all the stuff we had and if it was going to be a burden to me I would gladly get rid of it :-)
But that's me. I could come purge for you but then you might do just as my husband does and pick through the trash and say "what are you throwing this away for?" ~giggle~giggle~
Blessing to you on your new venture of cleaning out the house~
~Cinnamon
Yes Kathy! This topic is so great! I agree about overall feeling of starting anew which follows on the heels of Christmas. It is an upbeat postlude, and I've been enjoying it these past few days!
Regarding the art of storing and living simply: My husband and I are definite appreciators of artful goodies, old things, lovely furniture, sentimental bits of nostalgia, AND YET we are minimalists through and through! We've just come to terms with a balance, founded on the idea that we'd rather have fewer things, well-kept and nicely stored, than more things that are helter skelter, here and there.
My daughter's wardrobe always has a good supply of clothing I wore as a child because of my mom's diligence in saving things, which I am so thankful for! But she saved EVERYTHING, and the house always felt a little chaotic. She was always frustrated that thing weren't tidy, and it did add tension for everyone I think.
While we definitely store wearable clothing for each age/gender (always have a labeled container handy in childrens' closet with room for outgrown clothing) we want our lives to be more about people, relationships, ideas, the intangibles, than about STUFF. I find if there is too much quantity of STUFF in the house, it is harder to move beyond home-maintenance mode and engage in more meaningful activities! An example of our philosophy in practice: we've purged all toys except for books, legos, and a select number of dolls/stuffed animals. The rest is up and out of reach for special days or friends visiting.
Forgive my longwindedness!
God bless you as you endeavor to simplify!
-Marybeth
Coming from a family of hoarders I can say I think I understand. You walk a line between frugality and glutony. When I joined the AirForce I learned to be simple, basic and streamlined. To me frugality is just as much about repurposing for others as it is for yourself. I give away, give away, give away. If I haven't used it in a year, I give away. So, if I am buying used or from yardsales... it is no huge loss of money and I am making others happy too (hopefully.) Good luck to you. I am sure you'll do great whatever you decide to do with it.
I write a bit on this topic on my blog:
http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/angelnavywife/Homemaking//
I grew up in a house with packrats as well, and have embraced he opposite spectrum!
You already have a lot of great comments here. I think it comes down to perspective and practicality. For perspective, we've got to remember that is is all going to burn one day! It is only stuff! I heard Don Aslot speak at a homeschool convention one time, and he reminded us that the more clutter you have, the more in BONDAGE you are to your house and things. The more you have, the more you have to dust; the more you have, the more you have to move; the more you have, the more you have to store.... I had a theater teacher in school who used to say, "Less is more". I believe that applies here, too, in most situations. I had a friend who was a missionary, and she always kept very little in her house, because she wanted to be able to go when God said, "GO"! She didn't want to be tied to her stuff.
I battle the piles and the 'but one day...' mentality myself. But I am getting better. I have a friend who buys really nice clothes for her kids, and at the beginning of every season, she goes through their closets and gives us what doesn't fit them anymore. We reap the benefits, but even then, it is often too much for us. I go through the bags of clothes and try to be really practical. Will this fit one of the children when it is in season? is it modest? I make piles of sizes and types of clothing - if there are six pairs of jeans all in one size - I get rid of 2. I keep more than I would buy, simply because these are used clothes and will wear out faster. I keep plastic bins with tight, snap-on lids in the shed with clothes for the future. I make labels and put them on the front of each bin with the gender and size. If there is anything special like a winter coat, I mark that as well. I have a bin just for shoes. I tie the laces together for each pair, and if the size is not easy to find or read, I write it on the sole in permanent marker, so when we are looking for a certain size shoe, we can find it easily later. I also write the size ranges on the label on front of the bin.
I love the idea of getting rid of everything you haven't used in year. It is so true. I was given a brand new tortilla making iron one time, from someone who got it for their wedding -- TEN years before that! I made my own tortillas on occasion, and thought this would come in handy. It sat in my cupboard for several years before I gave it to Goodwill. I NEVER once used it!
Whenever you get something new (or at least new to you), get rid of at least that much of your old stuff.
Old baskets make lovely containers for gifts of cookies and baked goods for the neighbors, but I am always afraid of burdening others with extra 'stuff' as well. I like to donate it.
When I first started having children, my sister-in-law gave me a bunch of boxes of girls' clothes. I stored them in the garage, waiting for my girl. After three boys in a row, I decided to donate the girls' clothes to a pregnancy center. Two months later, I found out I was pregnant. Guess what it was! A GIRL! :-) But God is so good! I was given so much after she was born, that I didn't have to buy ANYthing for her in a very long time!
I say, if in doubt, get RID of it!! ;-)
You will feel sooooo free afterwards! You don't realize how much "STUFF" bogs you down until it is GONE! And have fun...! :-)
Maellen
We say when in doubt-throw it out. And we live by "you don't need more room, just less stuff." So when the walls or shelves start shrinking it is time to get rid of stuff. We live in a double wide with no outside storage like garage, shed ect. So everything has to fit inside like tools and Christmas deco...a bit extreme. We are looking forward to closing in our car port soon:)
Kelsy's mom:
Blodgett comment is my sister Maellen Blodgett, just in case you were wondering..:)
Lydia
Good Morning~
Here is my laundry recipe~
HOMEMADE LAUNDRY SOAP
Homemade Laundry Soap
1 bar of soap ( I use Fels Naphtha or Dove)I like Dove best!
1 cup washing soda
1/2 cup Borax
5 gallon container
few drops of essential oil if desired ~I use Downy scent
1. grate the bar of soap
2. melt the soap in 4 cups of water~keep stirring until melted
3. fill 5 gallon bucket half full with hot water
4. add melted mixture, soda, and borax
5. fill to the top with more hot water
6. stir~let sit for 24 hours then stir again
It will take 3 or 4 days to thicken. I stir it each day!
This then makes 5 gallons of Laundry soap for about $2.00!
My secret the scent I buy from Nature's Garden Candle Supply~it smells just like Downy.
I use that oil for a lot of things and it is the cheapest I have found!
FABRIC SOFTENER RECIPE
It is just as good as Downy~I promise.
Give it a try~I think you will be pleased!
1 cup vinegar
2 cups hair conditioner ( I like Suave Wild Cherry Blossom)
6 cups of water
4-5 drops of Downy essential oil
Mix all this together. You may use this like any other Fabric Softener.
If you prefer dryer sheets you can try this~I diluted this down with water~ 3 parts water, 1 part softener. I then poured it into this glass container. Next I added sponges. For each load~ wring out the sponge and add to the dryer as you would fabric sheets. I added a few drops of Downy scent! Smells wonderful!
I save a lot of money by CVS and Walgreen shopping. I will post about it again wnen I get the time. Sometimes they pay me to shop there. Until then check out Moneysavingsmom.com!
This is an excellent and much needed topic! I am now in a 1700 sq. ft house after just moving from a 4000 sq ft, 7 bedroom, 3 bath home with a great basement. Now I can hardly fit my family in this house! Due to the open floor plan there are few walls, so few closets, and very little storage. I am down sizing. We had to when we moved and most of our stuff is in storage. I agree. Out of sight is out of mind. If we really need something we go looking, but come spring I think we will have a big garage sale.
I heard once that a great rule of thimg to avoid the pack rat disease is this: If it is not an important document, and it can't love you back - get rid of it! God bless you as you simplify!
Oh - and another thing I have done is take pics of the item....takes less space to store.
I just found out about this website called 'flylady'. She gives ideas for clutter control and house cleanliness. It looks quite helpful. http://flylady.net/index.asp
Happy New Year! Maellen
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